Chris Mansell

Raskol of the heart

1.

I choke in the stile

split and splinter

stutter out a stunted thing

can't say can't step over

I can't say suck in air

all the wrong shapes

it's oxygen with angles

and stops in the throat

I want air I want

to step into the sky

I want the want too big

I want to say

what can't be stumbled

on the hook look here stay

2.

he fucks like a man

deprived of sex and

kisses for days, weeks

and years aching and

licking my cuntish

parts caught at

the howl and at

the womanly crying

out he plants his rod

in me lightens

the load my eyes

catch the spark

and I swallow

the world whole

3.

I am trying not to love

I am ridding myself of longing

I am salting my plains

I am abandoning my towns

and destroying the temples

I will stop love from blistering

the pavements I am halting

the stars I am capturing the sun

and staring into the light

I am standing in my own skin

I am reckoning my bones

I am disciplining my heart

and I banish the moon

and all of this I do for you

***

Young Logan visits the sea

I go to the ocean

and get there just in time.

The wide brilliant

writhing thing is waiting

for me. It is lapping, salient,

eager and impatient

for me, just me, to come.

I'm here! I'm here!

Its great pacific breath,

its sobbing, is deep

relief at my arrival –

just in time. Just in time!

Can you imagine

if I had not come today!

***

in Barcelona

everything is suspended

even the air

a disbelief of light

a Gaudi fantasmagoria

in Barcelona the city

is your lover

you sleep only

after the struggle with

the shapes of the Avinguda

those who have the courage

to break down the city walls

for the sake of beauty

love Barcelona

her sacred grinning sky 

***

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